Just wondering???

Hi everyone, I'm just going to throw it out there and I hope I'm not breaking any rules nor do I hope I'm going to get laughed at? But I'm sure I'm not the only one out there in exactly the same situation as myself? I'm 33yo now and have been reading and researching about doing my first cycle for years now, have been actively working out for around 10 years and have always flirted with the idea of doing steroids! I have finally decieded on what course I would like to do for my first which would be a 12 week course of test-e only (am open to all suggestions) I have arimidex on hand already to take at .25 ed or eod, I haven't decieded yet and I have tamoxifen ready for pct which I was going to take starting 2 weeks after final pin at an initial dose of 40-40-20-20mg over four weeks but I have more if needed to go longer! ( would also like to know if you guys think this all sounds ok?) so I feel like I'm ready to go and I've been waiting for so long and I'm really pumped!!! There's just one problem..... I just can't seem to source the right stuff, i recently aquired some UGL test but everyone on here says constantly to stay away from UGL gear coz there's heaps of pharma going around and stuff like that and everything negative you read about UGL brands literally makes you feel like you would never use the stuff coz it's all a little hit and miss??? Just pin it and get bloods done? Not to sure if I'm keen to just experiment? So I got rid of the stuff. I don't even know what sort of answer I could be given on this forum that's ok with the rules but where on earth is all the quality pharma grade stuff? It's just really annoying being so ready to get going but just can't due to not knowing what brands to trust as it just seems that everything is fake or copied or not even what it states to be? Would just love some feedback to see what anyone thinks coz I can't be the only one out there with this issue? And I just want to make clear I'm NOT asking for sources!! Just some feedback! Cheers

Just wondering???